Lately, I've been wanting to stop time. Just stop at this phase in my life. I feel like I'm already living the "highlights" of my life and I really want to stay like this always. I feel that I'm getting closer to the edge. The edge that I've been dreading for, for the past 3 years. Well, actually dread is not the exact word that best describes it, but let's just say it's something that I've been avoiding all this time and now I feel like it's only a block away from me, creeping in, and ready to jump right at my face at the exact time that I'm not expecting it. When that time comes, I don't have any idea what I'll do. I don't know what my reaction will be. I don't know what my feelings will be. I just know that right now I'm scared. Scared that when that time comes, I might bolt. Scared that when that time comes, I might disappoint everyone. Scared that when that time comes, I might hurt someone. At the same time, I'm also excited. I will lie if I deny that I don't imagine it happening. I sometimes smile, when my imagination takes over me and everything falls into place. I sometimes wish to skip everything and just go straight to it. Because I know that everything in between will be challenging, stressful, and difficult... I wish I only have 2 options, stop time, or skip time, I want it either way. But I know deep down, that nothing will be worthwhile, nothing will feel right unless I go thru time....